You Want Me To Stick That Where?

You know what pisses me off? After four months of rehearsing for Willy Wonka the week we open I get sick. And not just your run of the mill, everyday common cold. Oh no. It’s not that simple. It has be the mother of all sinus problems with allergies sprinkled on top for good measure.

Hating doctors and not having medicine at home to take, I did the one thing that anyone who needed to get better immediately would do. I turned to Twitter.

I tweeted my dilemma and within in moments I had a mixture of well wishes and remedies. One in particular I never heard of kept popping up, the Neti Pot.

Without knowing much about it, I called my mom to babysit and flew to the nearest drug store. Before I knew it I was standing in front of the rack of sinus and allergy medicines holding a box with a cute little blue tea kettle looking thing on it. It didn’t look so bad and everyone was raving about how it opens you up so I decided to give it a shot. Trusting strangers I’ve never met with my sinuses, I went to pay for my cute little kettle and even got an instant rebate! My day was looking up.

Then I got home and read the instructions.

“Oh HELL No!”

“Oh, look, Grammy! Mommy bought me a new tea kettle!”

While my daughter played with the kettle, I was reading how the spout, where pretend tea was currently being poured out of, is supposed to be inserted into one of my nostrils. As I tilt my head forward and to the opposite side, the water mixed with salt and baking soda was going to go in the one nostril and come out of the other.

Again, I repeated,  “Hell. No!”

The 30 page instruction manual landed with a thud on my dining room table. I stalked into my living room and flopped onto the sofa. All day I thought of that little blue kettle and the absurdity of its intended use. I took my frustrations out on Twitter; I felt betrayed by my new friends. How could they suggest something like this? I found some sympathy but mostly people were telling me to stop being a baby and just do it. Even my dear and supportive friend Susi wanted me to record my first attempt, for educational purposes, I’m sure.

Isn’t she a doll?

With opening night quickly approaching and my sinus passage nowhere near clear I actually started to contemplate using the little devil. I paced back and forth in the kitchen and thought, “screw it.” I picked up the blue devil, as I started to call it, filled it with the right amount of water, dumped in the pre-packaged mixture of salt and baking soda and had a quick laugh over what I was about to do.

Standing over the sink (clean of dishes, mind you) I brought the kettle up to my nose and inserted the spout into my right nostril. Tilting my head to the left I started to pour the liquid up my nose. I felt some pressure build in my sinuses, much like when you’re swimming and water goes up your nose. (I know, duh.)

Then, it happened. The liquid began to drip out of my left nostril. I started to giggle which was a mistake because then the salt water started to go down my throat causing me to gag. I sounded like a demented seagull. If you want to know what one sounds like just do what I just did.

After using about half the solution I blew my nose and repeated the steps to the other side. When I ran out of the solution I blew my nose and just stood there.

I took a deep breath in through my nose and pushed it back out the same way. A smile starting forming as I realized that the stupid little plastic kettle thing worked. The damn thing actually worked! I still had a sore throat and my eyes were still itchy, but I could take care of that with cough drops and some OTC allergy medicine.

I left for my show feeling confident and clear. For about an hour when it closed back up again 😦

But never fear, fellow Neti Pot users, if you’re reading this, I haven’t given up on my little blue devil. The instructions recommend you “rinse” twice a day and so I have been and I do feel a great deal better. I am happy to announce that although it is one of the most disgusting practices I have ever done, it is something I will continue to do.

What about you guys? Do you have any disgusting or different remedies that help you get over colds, allergies, common ailments? I’m up for the new Neti Pot discovery!

My Little Blue Devil

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22 Responses to You Want Me To Stick That Where?

  1. Amy Cavenaugh says:

    I have never heard of a Neti Pot and while it sounds scary I may just have to try it next time I’m stuffed up w/ no relief in sight! So glad it worked for you & hope you’re feeling all better now! 🙂 When I have a sore throat, I usually drink hot lemon tea. It really helps me. It may not be a permanent fix but it certainly soothes my throat in a way nothing else will. I abhor taking medicine — I have this *thing* about being medicated. So I’ll give any natural remedies a shot, at least once. 😉

    • Karen DeLabar says:

      I just hate going to the doctor. I have no reason why, nothing bad has ever happened, just not a doctor sort of girl. So, I’m always looking for remedies that I can do at home to help.

      I love tea with a little honey to help with the throat. In fact, I hid some on stage with me this past weekend!

      As far as the Neti Pot is concerned, it’s an odd practice but one I recommend!

  2. Lisa says:

    LOL! Sounds gross but delightful. You have to train your body to stay stressed until after the show is over and then become deathly ill–as mine always does. 😉

    • Karen DeLabar says:

      The things we do for art!

      I am usually the same way. I’m too hyped up on the show that I don’t get sick. The day after we close, however, getting out of bed is out of the question. I have never had to deal with this, which is why I was so freaked out.

      I guess allergies and sinuses don’t care what you’re doing when they strike. They have no respect for the creative process 😉

  3. Jennie B says:

    I’m a Zicam fan myself, but you can only use that stuff for three days because it’s so powerful.
    I actually had a friend once post a picture of herself using the nettie pot, and I must say I was grossed out enough to not want to try it.

    • Karen DeLabar says:

      The picture in the manual, which is literally 30 pages, shows a woman using it while smiling…smiling!!! There is no way someone can do that and smile. It’s not a pleasant experience at first, but I kinda like it now. It’s turing into an obsession; a sickness in itself 😉

      I’ve never used Zicam before. May have to check that out.

  4. Shay Fabbro says:

    *falls off couch* Bwahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!

    I laugh in total and complete sympathy because that’s EXACTLY how I felt the first time I used it! My sister was in the bathroom with me and her earnest expression while watching me shove the end of the Neti Pot in my nose made me laugh so hard. Which I guess must have made me sound like a demented seagull…

    The worst part for me is the swelling feeling I get behind my eyes! I feel like the solution is going to come dripping out of my tear ducts!

    • Karen DeLabar says:

      LOL! You crack me up!

      It is an odd experience. I thought everyone was crazy when they suggested it to me. But I should know better than to question the wisdom of my creative friends on Twitter.

  5. I couldn’t do, oh no no no no no. I hold my nose closed when I rinse my face in the shower and I can’t even swim with my head under water. I actually panic if i think there is water going up my nose! You are one hell of a brave woman.

    I do believe I had mentioned this to you on Twitter but for your faithful readers here I will give them the remedy my mother used on me as a child which is way less, uhm, invasive, than your little Smurfly Tea Pot there, it’s called:

    “The Vicks Treatment”
    Take a large pot of water, add a generous amount of Vicks Vapour Rub. Heat mixture until it is steaming nicely but not scolding hot. Place a towel over your head and the pot so that you are breathing in the steam. With in minutes or perhaps even one or two minutes, your sinuses and nose should clear out like mice in a cat house!

    • one more thing to add.

      Charlie Sheen, if you are reading this posting it REALLY IS salt and baking soda, don’t try any substitutions.

      • Karen DeLabar says:

        Oh, my God, Dennis, you are hysterical! If Charlie Sheen reads this blog, Susi and I need to rethink some things.

        I remember our conversations about the wonder that is Vicks vapor rub. I went out and bought some yesterday. I never mixed it with hot water to breath in the steam, but I think I’ll try it.

        Thanks so much, Dennis. I always enjoy your comments!

    • Susan Borath says:

      Seriously, I am so trying that! I am allergic to vicks–I break out in hives if I put it on my skin–but it works so well!! They have a little inhaler that works pretty well, but this sounds even better! Thanks for the suggestion!

  6. Susan Borath says:

    I still think you should have recorded it!! And then posted it here! 🙂 (I only say this because it isn’t me.)

    In all honesty, Pookie and I have been using it for years. Actually, he uses it 1-2 times a day, every day, and has for over 10 years since his allergist suggested it. (That’s serious dedication!) I only use it when I am sick or my allergies are really bothering me. Like now, when I can’t take allergy meds. It is the only thing that gets me through!

    Although I have to agree… seriously gross! 😀

    • Karen DeLabar says:

      I don’t know if I could do it for 10 yrs straight, but in a pinch it works wonders! L is a little disappointed that I took her new tea kettle away, but she has plenty others 😉

  7. Bev Werner says:

    I love my Neti pot – been using it for years – the trick is – look in a mirror while you do it to make sure your head is at the right angle, don’t breath & have plenty of tissues ready!

    • Karen DeLabar says:

      There is no way I’d be able to watch myself perform this task! And the tissues, yeah, learned that the hard way. Now I have a box by the sink for such occasions!

      Thanks for stopping by, Bev!

  8. The first time I did the netti pot thing it was no where near as glamorous as your little blue devil. My yoga teacher turned up to class with some plastic sauce bottles, filled them with warm water and sea salt and presented us with one each… we had to insert the nozzle into a nostril, tilt our heads and let it pour in… ‘OMG,’ I thought.. but, as you experienced, Yippee.. relief. I haven’t heard of the baking soda bit, but I know it works perfectly with sea salt and warm water. I am glad you have found this great and simple help in time for your show!

    • Karen DeLabar says:

      Yeah, it was an experience. Several friends have said that they used a squirt bottle to help “get it up there.” (ick, just writing that makes me cringe) But, what works, works, right?

      Yes, I think I’ll keep my little blue devil for the time being 🙂

      Thanks for suggesting it; you were one of the first ones that brought it to my attention and told me to get over myself and just use it. 😉

  9. I am all about natural remedies but I’ve never been brave enough to give the neti pot a shot. Usually I just take a really steamy shower. I might try it…someday. LOL

    • Karen DeLabar says:

      LOL, yeah, its not for the faint of heart! I can’t watch the video or look at pictures of other people doing it and I certainly won’t watch myself in a mirror, but I will continue to use it!

  10. Cathy says:

    First saw this on Oprah a few years ago. It was recommended by Dr. Oz. Dana and Jaime use it and it really works. Dana always takes the entire box of tissues in with her.

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