I Call This Post…Number Six. Brilliant!

I hate starting posts. Did you know that? Absolutely loathe it. I dread the first five, ten, twenty minutes of writing these posts because I know that those five, ten, twenty minutes will most likely involve me sitting in front of the computer staring at a blank screen with that little blinking black line. I hate that line. With each blink I feel like its making fun of me, taunting me. “Go ahead, Kaye. Start typing. Make me move across the screen only to delete everything and move me back again.”

See it all starts with an idea, as most things do. I have a great idea for a post. It’s going to be my best post ever, people are going to rave about it, we’re going to have so many comments that our server is going to crash. (Don’t laugh, you know you have these dreams, too.) So I sit down at the computer with all my thoughts and funny anecdotes swirling around in my head. The words are anxious and fighting amongst themselves to get out of my mind and onto the page, they’re that brilliant. Then as my fingers descend to the keyboard the words disappear; its like they all get stage fright and bury themselves behind the curtains of my mind. It’s absolutely ridiculous.

I’ve tried everything from outlining ahead of time to just starting in the middle of a post where the words come easier, hoping that something will emerge that can be used as the perfect opener. Always hopeless. Although, I do have an idea as to why I have this problem.

Everybody knows that if you can’t hook them from the start its less likely that they’ll continue to read your post/book/essay/dirty joke. There have been many times that I have opened a book read the first page or two then politely closed the book and set it back on the shelf. In those first few pages I lost interest. I feel like I’m kidding myself if I expect to write a book and I can’t even start a blog post. (Overdramatic, right? Well, look at my bio….its kind of my thing.)

What’s the point of this post you ask? I’ll tell you. I have no freaking clue. I sat down to write a post about something else and this is what came out because I didn’t know how to start my original idea. So I just started typing. I’m using today as a form of therapy. I apologize if you didn’t get anything out of this post. I doubly apologize if you usually get something out of my posts and today you have not. Although if you usually walk away with something then I feel you need to seek your own type of therapy because something is clearly wrong with you. Just kidding.

Please tell me I’m not the only one that has this problem! There has to be someone out there that has brilliant ideas but never know how to introduce them to people. What do you do to fix it? What exercises are there out there for people like me, the novel/blog post-opening challenged?

AND TITLES! Let’s not forget about titles. I stink at coming up with titles. How is that possible? I spend so much time with these characters, devote thousands upon thousands of words to them and yet when it comes to giving them a deserving title my mind freezes and I just want to entitle it “My Novel: Vol. 1” My blog posts all start of with “Blog Post” followed by whatever number it is. It doesn’t usually get a title until three minutes before I post it.

Well, after reading this there is one thing to be said about my writing posts. I may not know how to start it but once I get going I don’t shut up. 🙂


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1 Response to I Call This Post…Number Six. Brilliant!

  1. Ana Quinn says:

    I feel your pain. Pookie and I joke that it takes 3 hours for me to write a blog post – 2.5 for the first sentence, and a half hour for the rest. It is terrible! I would love to hear any suggestions that anyone has for this.

    I do have a trick for titles–let Pookie read it, and have him come up with the title! 🙂

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